T is for Terrorist and I’d hoped to avoid this but matters have rather intruded into my personal space. You know how large events of national and international significance can be jaw droppingly horrific but somehow not quite intimate enough to catch you full on, and then something trivial happens that wallops it home? Well this week my tumble dryer ground to a halt – lots of hot air and hum but no drum action and containing two piles of cold, wet rugs. I call in the troops.
After replacing the drive belt and removing enough fluff to keep the soft toy industry going for months, we are back in business. I sign the invoice.
‘Typical doctor’s signature, can’t make head or tail of it,’ the chap says, as they always do.
‘Takes years to get it that good – there’s a special course,’ I respond, as I always have.
‘Does that come before or after the one on bomb making?’ he replies, as they never did before.
 A doctor had tried to bomb Glasgow railway station in 2007
From Not Being First Fish by P Spencer-Beck. Available from Amazon (non-illustrated edition). Second edition (illustrated) due 2018.